“SEX IS BEAUTIFUL!!!! LOVE YOUR KIDS!!!” These are aggressive statements. Especially when they are yelled at you from across a dining room table by an 85-year-old nun. I was 18, and sitting in my “Family Values” religion class. Sr. Delores, or Sr. D-Lo as she was more commonly known, had been a teacher at our…
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I could feel the women’s jaws clench in unison as the pizza man walked across the room. The scent of sauce and cheese, usually a smell of comfort, hung like a harbinger of doom as the kids took their seats at the table. “I was really good yesterday. I had a hamburger, without the bun.…
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I had a super hot date with a married woman last night. She was about 5’5”, blonde, with a wicked sense of humor…it was me guys. I’m talking about me. I took myself out to dinner for the first time in my entire life. I’m not…
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Want to scare yourself? Scroll through your newsfeed and catch up on current events. Want to terrify yourself so badly, that you crawl under the covers, and rock back in forth in a cold sweat? Scroll through your newsfeed, and then look into the eyes of a toddler (preferably yours, or ones that you…
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I married a serial hobby starter. Maybe the more accurate term would be hobby abandoner. Our home is filled with the ghosts of hobbies past, remnants of projects collecting dust in the basement, attic, and shed. First there was the cigar box guitar. Then there was wood carving. Gardening left me with a 5’x’5 trench…
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My heart raced as I ran towards the kiddie pool. Taking a clue from my children’s guilty faces, I expected the worst. “Where is she?!” I demanded. “She’s just taking a nap after her swim.” Lifting back the drenched towel cradled in my daughter’s arms, I gasped at what looked more like raw chicken breasts…
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